Introduction
When one says networking, its not simply that you link, tag, friend-accept, text, ping, IM – it is how you effectively leverage each one of those wired moments. One only has to look at the latest Dentyne advertisements to see how wired we are as a society today. Its all well and good when you are in high-school looking for the most popular award to say I have 250 connections on Linkedin.com, but once you reach the level of middle-management, the biggest decision you have is no longer the table you sit at in the cafeteria on taco day, but who is on your right and left at the boardroom table. More importantly, it is do those people think of me when they leave the boardroom? Alas, popularity still matters, but now it’s manageable – it is who you are connected with be it Gabby Reeces’s Honeyline or LinkedIn.
We have all heard that you should never go grocery shopping when you’re hungry. Makes sense, right? If you’re already hungry, you’re going to crave the bright yellow Twinkies and justify that it is probably more filling than some celery. God bless instant gratification! The basic principle is that the shopper (or future-eater, if you will) will be more pragmatic and objective in shopping, and less influenced by impulse and desperation when the growling of their stomach isn’t distracting him or her – when there isn’t a sense of desperation. So here’s a question – why do we suddenly remember those associates and colleagues that we pass in the hallway with an off-handed “hey” while we stroll in our Dilbert-esque worlds only when we need them?
To understand the importance of networking, or connecting, think back to the golden rule. Answer the following question for yourself: If someone you haven’t had a “real” conversation with in 4 months suddenly called and said I need your help immediately for something I’m working on, would you drop what you’re doing and help? As has been said in the past “An emergency for you does not necessitate an emergency for me”.
It is imperative to create the foundation of working relationships so when and if a time arises which does, in fact, necessitate a need, it is not perceived as the equivalent of a long lost cousin calling asking for money.
First Exercise:
Write a list of 5 people whom you work with who have a position or role that interests you. Interest, in this sense, implies they are in touch or connected to either a position or skill set with which you wish to be more exposed.
Write down what it is about the individual that interests you. This could be something such as “communication skills”, “technical knowledge”, or as simple as “well known in the company”. Try to be as specific as possible.
After writing the list, write down situations in which you interact with each individual. It’s important to think of situations beyond participating a standing meeting. Think of situations such as coffee rooms, shared commutes, and et al. if possible.
On a scale of 1-5, rate how memorable you feel these interactions would be to the other person, 1 being something you forgotten on the way back to their office and 5 being something that may enter their mind later in the day as an anecdote.
If you have a series of 1-3 ratings, think about it. What does that say to you?
The Austrian philosopher, Martin Buber, once said that if do not allow ourselves to be one hundred percent present at every instant of our existence, we will never fully understand a) ourselves and b) others. Yet humanity, as a whole, tends to lead a “Uh-huh, okay” existence, with head-nodding apathy in daily interactions. We fear, as we should, vulnerability, the idea of de-masking ourselves. Looking at this philosophy from a career lens, there is a different level of importance. Now, I do not mean to imply that you should spend every moment with those on your list and treat it like a Dr. Phil or Oprah episode, but each interaction with these people who represent something of importance to you should be managed – you should recognize each interaction as an opportunity to create impression.
Now that’s easy to say – anybody that has dropped water, had the squeaky chair during a meeting, stated the obvious during a brainstorming session knows that you have definitely left an impression. What I am venturing to say is that you can control the impression you leave. We often notice these interactions after the fact. What is interesting, however, is that your level, you know how to manage customers – be it internal, team members, other departments – but we don’t look at ourselves as a commodity or a product that needs to leverage each interaction with our proverbial customers, i.e. our network. Customer relationship management can be serving as a major differentiator for companies, so why don’t we use the same principles with ourselves?
In the first exercise we recognized customers who we deem as priority for the “future” they can provide. It’s easy to say leverage a relationship. From a theoretical perspective, most of us can intuitively say that yes, I can recognize people I think would be beneficial to know. Here’s a question most people gloss over: what do I want them to recognize in me?
Most people have heard the idea of having a 30 second elevator pitch. Some of us have even created them in our heads. Now, when you’ve actually been in the elevator, have you ever used your pitch? As is true with customer relationship management, you know the commodity, and you know the customer – what you do with the information that matters. Lists can be generated, but more often than not, we get stuck in a moment of “okay, so now what?” Think about an anecdote, a story that can speak to the characteristic you want to be known for. Write it down. Most people can’t be Drew Cary with the practiced ability of improvisation, so why put yourself in that situation? By writing it down now, you are arming yourself with the tools necessary if and when the opportunity presents itself.
Stayed tuned for Exercise 2!!!
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